Hey, married people, married people to-be, and one day wanna-bes. This morning on the horrific 20th hour of the Today Show, one of the topics was about women changing their names after marriage. Here’s a link to the USA Today article.
Officially, I changed my name after I got married… or perhaps a better way to say it is that I added to my name. In addition to my first name, I kept my middle name, which is also my mom’s maiden name. I also kept my maiden name, which is my dad’s last name. Combined, they are both my middle name. Kind of like “Mary Jane” but not. haha. Then I tacked on the hubby’s last name as my last name. It’s all over paperwork and whatnot but there’s a catch. I don’t go by his last name at work. While this has caused some confusion from time to time—incorrect names on name tags, the “oh, that’s your maiden name?” comment, confused emails—it’s the decision I’ve made and I’m stickin’ to it.
Part of the reason I did this is because, well, it’s my name. It’s been my name for my entire life. It’s part of my identity. It’s not like I’m “Jane Smith.” My name is really unusual. I’m the girl with the weird, ethnic name and I like it. The hubby’s last name is very much his. And what I mean by that is if you were to read my married name and then meet me in person, the two things would not match… at all.
And while I am using the hubby’s name in my personal life, I choose to honor my dad by using his last name in my “public” life. I don’t have a brother and I only have one male cousin in the US that shares my family name, so why not carry on the name myself? I think it’s kind of cool for my dad to see our name by my door at work. 🙂
I have a feeling I might be one of the most complicated ones out there, but it’s show and tell time. Have you kept your maiden name? Is it your middle name? Oooh, are you a hyphen? And if a guy reader is willing to respond, I’d like to know if you would change your last name if it were a common practice to pick either person’s last name.